Are you good at doing nothing?
It’s a query I’ve been occupied with loads. And for these of us who see ourselves as productive and sufficiently busy, these of us who’re suppliers, earners or creators, I’d like the reply to more and more be, “sure.” I’d like for us to see that doing nothing could be one thing in itself, and never essentially the shortage of an exercise deemed extra important.
However I’m discovering it powerful. Not simply because I’m fidgety and stressed as a rule, however due to the fixed strain to do, to make, to provide.
I’ve come to see that our society typically presents time as a inflexible binary; one thing both for use productively… or wasted.
We wrestle with the in-between.
Time is treasured.
Nobody ever mentioned on their deathbed, I want I labored extra.
Time is cash.
Effectively that’s two hours I’ll by no means get again!
Okay, so I mentioned that final one myself, simply final week as the tip credit rolled on the Ant-Man film.
However you realize what else occurred throughout these 125 minutes? I linked with my 17-year-old. We created a brand new shared expertise. On the subway experience residence, we one-upped one another by naming the worst motion film cliches. (“He’s proper behind me, isn’t he.”) We learn the snarkiest Letterboxd evaluations. We laughed. Loads.
Possibly it wasn’t one of the best $36 in film tickets I ever spent, however it wasn’t wasted time both.
As we enter a brand new period with smart pushback in opposition to hustle tradition and girl-bossing and the canonization of Mothers Who Do it All — as a result of nobody ever actually did all of it, did they? — I’m completely 100% right here for it. It’ll take time, although. (No pun supposed.) As a result of American tradition has all the time assigned relative worth to the methods we spend our time, with the least worth positioned on these issues give us pleasure or give us peace, or just permit us to decelerate, relaxation and refuel.
The phrase productive itself — are you aware the primary definition that Merriam-Webster suggests? Having the standard or energy of manufacturing particularly in abundance.
In abundance!
No marvel I beat myself up about nonetheless being in my pajamas at 11:59AM, consuming my second lukewarm cup of espresso and catching up on the information. Not very considerable of me.
Whereas the tradition could also be slowly altering, as Gen Z rises up with their more healthy views on work-life stability, I’m nonetheless discovering it arduous to push again in opposition to our my very own, deeply internalized expectations of myself and the way I feel I’m imagined to spend the 1440 minutes I’ve been gifted every day.
How typically have I believed that with all of the hours doing crosswords on my commute, I may have learn extra ebooks in my queue? How typically do I look again on the manuscripts pals completed through the darkish, quarantined days of 2020 and really feel regret at my must trash a nearly-done guide proposal of my very own? How typically do I see pals on social media gleefully sharing a jam-packed weekend outing with household, the right stability of academic and entertaining, whereas my circle of relatives sat round the lounge doing…I’m not even certain what.
And there it’s: the self-deprecation. The guilt. The necessity for me to apologize — to myself, and I suppose to all of you— for not “taking benefit” of that weekend. It’s such a reflex, I do that with out even occupied with it!
However wait.
Our “I’m not even certain what” might have been an extremely significant use of time. Possibly video gaming or limitless social media scrolling was precisely what we would have liked to do after a full, draining week of faculty and work and stress and obligations and all that productive productiveness.
Creators can’t simply create nonstop, 24/7. It’ll blow up on you finally. I’ve been there.
Let’s go straightforward for giving ourselves what we want, particularly if it’s a break.
Lately I joined Margaret Ables on the What Contemporary Hell Podcast to speak about ditching the hustle. It’s a very good dialog, and I come out strongly in favor of issues that offer you pleasure, just because they provide you pleasure. It’s price a pay attention.
Hobbies don’t must be “side-hustles.” The artwork you like making doesn’t must be on the market. The books you get pleasure from don’t must be classics. The dinner you cook dinner doesn’t must be Instagrammable. The binge-watches don’t must be award-winners. And if our weekends aren’t jam-packed with thrills and delight, we don’t have to clarify it away (“I used to be simply so drained…”) like I hear pals and colleagues do each Monday morning with out fail.
The truth is, I’m wondering: What if we train ourselves to cease asking, “what did you do that weekend?” and as an alternative ask, “did you benefit from the weekend?”
It sounds nearly…European!
I don’t wish to do nothing with my time. However I do wish to make extra time for doing nothing.
As a result of as a result of possibly “nothing” isn’t nothing in any respect. Nothing is one thing. Nothing could be restoration. Nothing is usually a reset. Nothing may give ourselves house to kind concepts, construct on them, throw them away and restart. Nothing permits the synapses to fireside in all of the methods, creating channels of artistic ideas that department into tributaries that will or might not lead someplace that’s significant to you.
Possibly nothing will find yourself being a very powerful factor you’ll do all day.
Liz Gumbinner is a Brooklyn-based author, award-winning advert company artistic director, and OG mother blogger who was referred to as “humorous among the time” by an enthusiastic nameless commenter. This was initially posted on her Substack “I’m Strolling Right here!,” the place she covers tradition, media, politics, and parenting.
Picture by elizabeth lies on Unsplash.
